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Those Cows Are Pretty Intimidating…

Do you remember when you where a kid and your mom caught you doing something you weren’t supposed to be doing?  Were you one of those kids who would do anything to get out of it by appealing to her “motherly instincts” and instantaneously begin to shed tears – building yourself all the way up to full-blown hyperventilation?  I knew plenty of kids who could do it, and got away with stuff I only dreamed of…

Well, those kids grew up and headed off to college.  Apparently, a bunch of them went to the U of New Mexico where they are trying out those tried and true “get-my-way” tactics.  I guess they don’t realize crying and hyperventilating looks a lot different at age 20 than it did at age 5 (hint to anyone missing my sarcasm, it looks ridiculous).

Those students are making a fuss because there is a danger in their student center : Chick-Fil-A.  Yes, believe it or not, this little fast-food restaurant has posed a great risk to them causing sleepless nights, lower grades and taking all the fun out of Friday Night BeerPong.  I suppose they are imagining the Chick-Fil-A cows stumbling out of the student center in the middle of the night a la The Walking Dead?  “Eeeat Mooore…”

Gay students are claiming that they even felt threatened by the mere sight of students and faculty carrying bags with the Chick-fil-A logo on them.  Will Diane Feinstein be including these bags in her list of “Assault Weapons”?

Miquela Ortiz, Senator of the Associated Students of UNM, said,

Students started expressing to me they felt unsafe to go into their own campus union building. When they said they felt uncomfortable on campus, I felt it was an issue that I should bring up.

Brittany Arneson, a student against having Chick-fil-A on campus, testified at the meeting,

Please look at this from a moral standpoint. Look at the kids that are here that are telling you, ‘I do not feel safe on this campus anymore.’

She said this with a quivery, tear-filled voice (she must have been one of those kids) hoping to cause the Board to vote the flesh-eating food chain off campus.  It did not succeed, however, because the Board voted to keep it.  They are, after all, the grown ups on campus, and understand what a CONTRACT means.


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